Girls Like Us

Well…the garden has been planted in all its glory and we decided to expand it a bit more than last year. We both love playing in the dirt, creating a new configuration of flowers and vegetables along with a few new additions as well as our ever-present herb garden. We already have two very tiny tomatoes on our patio! Working in our garden has such healing energy… all of the different plants, each one needing its own special attention. You really must be present… kind of like our lives. We are all so unique but at the end of the day…all the same. We must pay attention to what we each need to thrive and blossom.

This time of year can pose some challenges. The kids are soon out of school and our routine for the past ten months is now put to the test. Of course…we’ll figure it out. We always figure it out. The key is not to get lost in the shuffle of the shuttling to and fro, back and forth, camp, summer classes, programs and such. It’s so easy to fall into that comfortable funk I continue to remind myself about, with n’er a thought otherwise. So, what happens then? Our “gardens” show signs of remiss, maybe even wilt a little from the lack of rich nourishment.

We hear lots of folks taking about “stay-cations”. I think I like that idea for many reasons. What kind of crazy adventures could we come up with right in our own back yards? How much money could we save by staying local and enjoying the sights and sounds of our nearby community? Local papers continue to hearken and beckon us to reach just a bit beyond our little town to take in all the other little towns have to offer; concerts, art openings, farmer’s markets, fairs, and much more. And…I’ll bet that most of this can be had for no more than the cost of a tank of petrol. Make a list and let each family member have a turn at choosing the next foray. Don’t forget games and snacks for the car ride. Oh, and by the way, I bet this kind of outing doesn’t induce that annoying and continuing question of “are we there yet”?

We recently had a very lovely outing at Nara Park in Acton. A short ride and fourteen dollars later, we were able to enjoy a beach setting, complete with white sand and an umbrella! We brought a picnic lunch and a couple games, Yatzee, of course, and had a very relaxing day, close to home. We left feeling relaxed and fortunate to have this special place nearby.

I think summer can be a time to reflect. We can each have a sense of how we want our lives to be and possibly take steps to move closer to those goals. It’s so important not to loose sight of our own well being in the midst of providing for our busy families. We don’t realize how much we do on any given day. A friend once told me if we were ever handed a list when we woke of all we were to do that day, we would stay in bed, I’m certain, he said.

Girls like us are competent women who are focused on the bigger picture most of the time. Let’s make sure we make the time to nurture and nourish our own little plots in order to reap a magnificent harvest in the not so distant future. We don’t have to figure out every last detail. Just by being true to ourselves, the details will fall into place, and take care of themselves. Before you know it, you will be picking the most beautiful and precious treasures from your garden to delight your senses and sooth your soul. Make a point to plant some really good seeds for yourself. You will indeed reap what you sow, I promise.

Deborah Ricci is a freelance columnist living in Maynard with her husband, Wil. She can be found joyfully cultivating her garden for the senses in her little shop, Teresina’s, in Downtown Maynard at 41 Main St. Wed.-Sat. 11-6. Feel free to contact her at 978-897-3914 or write her. Deborah@teresinas.com

Make Like a Sponge....Soak it all in!

Girls Like Us

Be a Sponge…Soak it In!

I am an avid fan of using the world as a classroom, the ultimate learning experience, and I will go so far as to say I advocate for a much needed break between the end of high school and the beginning of any kind of conventional higher learning. I also endorse taking that kind of “sabbatical” and using it to acquire a more unorthodox type of education. I don’t know if all graduating high school seniors really can define their one true aspiration. Don’t get me wrong, there are many who can. I know I sure wasn’t ready at 17 to commit to a life that involved something I had absolutely no interest in and thank God, the Dean of nurses at Grace New Haven miraculously knew the real me, who couldn’t even imagine my life going in that admirable, but wayward direction for the next 4 years! The universe intervened and showed itself through this amazing woman who sat opposite me and my parents that ominous day. Somehow she turned my fate around in that moment. I don’t remember the ride home, but a few short weeks later, I found myself in design school! Having always been of creative mind, I was elated, scared and down right shocked given the unexpected flurry of changes. My dad really wanted me to take on my mom’s profession. “It would always be something I could fall back on”, he said. It just wasn’t for me. I was, after all, a girl, that for years, insisted on reincarnating her gypsy garb to once again partake in Halloween festivities. I never tired of the wonderful fantasy I could immerse myself in, even if it was just for one evening a year. All the colourful textiles and layers; Beads, baubles, and bangles... the more the better! And...Lest we forget the temporary "mask" of rouge and lipstick. Ahhh…the “over the top” creative ritual of temporary transformation…Anyway, I digress…..Needless to say, I chose the path less travelled and have been following my bliss ever sense.

Today’s youth, albeit, only twenty-five or so years their parents’ junior, seem to have so much more emotional and intellectual maturity which has given rise to the extreme popularity for said sabbatical; almost making it a necessary part of the whole learning mission. By piecing together many varied experiences, life has a way of becoming the ultimate teacher. And…these young people really know how to take full advantage of this kind of amazing opportunity. I don’t think anyone can know where “alternative schooling” can take us. I really just think about the kind of story we could each have during the process. Think about the idea as kind of a revelation for the mind as well as the soul. Literally…the sky is the limit and often lends itself to making totally different choices after all. And yes... sometimes much to the chagrin of others. The self discovery that seems to be a large “side effect” of global trotting, reveals a new self, or helps the old self move in a new direction.

As an envious onlooker, are these amazing students of life being overly selfish or narcissistic or are they actually right on track? I read this quote once and it feels right in line with my lamentations. “Life to be vivid, strong, and creative, demands constant reflection upon experience, so that action may be guided by wisdom.” With that said, wisdom does indeed hatch from experience and how we choose to gain that most valuable lesson is purely personal. Going on to higher education is a relative term that needs to be considered from every angle. I myself look to the community and world around me daily. I am never disappointed and always inspired.


I will close with another quote by Beatrix Potter, who, by the way, went in a completely unconventional direction. “We cannot stay home all of our lives. We must present ourselves to the world and think of it as an adventure.” By the way, Miss Potter is the most acknowledged and successful children’s authors in the world!

Deborah Ricci is a freelance columnist living in Maynard with her husband, Wil. She can be found taking a journey of the senses at her little shop, Teresinas, in Downtown Maynard at 41 Main St. Hours: 11-6 Tues-Sat. 978-897-3914

An Epiphany to Remember!

Do you remember when you had an Epiphany so grand, that it brought you to tears? That is exactly what happened to me today. Lots of thoughts...all of them culminating feelings and BOOM.....my AHA moment, as Oprah likes to call it. But, did you know what the word AHA stands for? I'll tell ya....Awesomely Heightened Awareness, that's what....Okay, so I just made that up, but it sure works, doesn't it? Here is the clincher though...once this incredible moment shows itself, then what? Well, in a perfect world, we would have to act on it, right? Then what? Well, then we might have to change something! Oh...right! Much, much easier said than done.

I think, for me, it was very healing and as much as I was completely overtaken by it, I knew right then and there, change was a comin'....and I would have to be the driver.

It's like that in so many areas of our lives....some of them much bigger than others, of course, but none the less...without change, there is no growth....and we all know that without growth, we get stale, stagnate and fuzzy. I don't know about you, but I am allergic to mold.....

So...which vehicle do we choose to get there? And, do we need a co-pilot, or "wing man", if you will? I think the choice of vehicle is less important that plotting the way there is. Once we have made up our minds to alter something, the way seems to show up....for me, anyhow. It's about creating a clearing for the change to occur. Most of us are so stockpiled with old parts and pieces of our past, that another option doesn't dare show up for fear of getting lost in the shuffle. So, by creating space, any kind of space, we let the Universe know that we are willing to accept the next phase of our trip. There is an air of knowing and that feels good, my friends. It's so much easier to see when we strip away all of debris that keeps us from attaining our true goals. It's a messy job, but some one's gotta do it.

I will close today with just this one thought...Change is scary....but the lack of it is frightening.

Let's shorten our "To-Do" list!

Hi there....Here is something to think about on this rainy day...

Are you ready for a challenge? And...Not the kind where you risk life and limb to accomplish, either. No, a much simpler one, albeit not as easy, though. Here it is. I challenge you to take one hour a day just for yourself! Are you laughing hysterically and rolling your eyes just at the thought of this seemingly crazy an impossible idea? Now mind you, this well thought out advice is coming to you from a self proclaimed multi-tasker personified. However, you may be surprised to know that I am successfully regenerating my too-full calendar and taking some much needed “time in”, as Abby Seixas writes about in her wonderful, life saving book, “Finding The Deep River Within”.

There are many ways you can about this very important task. We are all so different and we must each find the way that best works for us. Here are some ideas of how you can begin to take better care of yourself while making changes in your daily schedule. Try and get to bed at a reasonable time. Seven or more hours is recommended in order to restore your body and brain. Strive to get to bed at the same time nightly. By creating an evening ritual, your body begins to fall into the new groove. It may be a bit more challenging if you have children, but once you get your routine down, everyone will get in the rhythm.

Another opportunity to seize some special solitude is mornings. I just love the morning, especially this time of year. You may choose to rise a bit earlier than the rest of your clan, and do something just for you. Take your tea or coffee outside. Bring your book or journal with you, and take in your surroundings. Listen to the early birds singing their morning scales. Walk around your yard and look for new little buds peeking their heads out of the ground. Try doing some stretches in your yard. “What would the neighbors think?” you ask. They are probably thinking what a great idea it is and you might have a stretching partner before too long. If you can squeeze it in, go for a brisk walk. You can clear your head and plan your day all at the same time. And…if neither of these times are possible, find 15-30 minutes in the middle of your day to just breathe and reflect. It will recharge your batteries and give you the energy you need for the second leg of your day.

One way or the other, let’s take the challenge together because you know, there is strength in numbers! Life is so busy. The urgency in your daily round can overshadow what is truly important…you! By putting ourselves first, everyone will benefit and change will begin to show in the smallest ways. We feel happier and calmer and those around us will reflect this new found pace of grace. I wish you the best of luck and may your guiding force be with you.
Deborah Viapiana-Ricci lives in Maynard with her husband, Wil. She is a Personal Fashion Stylist and Skin Care Educator. She can be found time “time in” at her store, Teresina’s, in Downtown Maynard at 41 Main St. Wed. 11-6, Thurs. 11-7, Fri. & Sat. 11-6. 978-897-3914

We ARE all the same! How great is that?!

Yesterday, I had the amazing good fortune of being one of the nearly 16,000 folks who had the wonderful opportunity of seeing the Dalai Lama! He graced us with his presence at Gillette stadium, of all places. The whole experience was surreal. At first, I just kept taking in my own awe....after all...here was THE Dalai Lama, # 14 to be exact....at that!

The most wonderful thing occurred though...while his inner most mission was to weave us all together with a common thread...Peace...everyone watched and listened for something we could take home with us and use in our daily lives. The myriad of people was astounding, from all walks of life. The stadium had a whole different tone from that of a football game. I guess it was just understood...the vibe was most definitely peaceful and respectful...kids and all.

We got there just before he began talking and as I settled myself into my seat, I was still trying to make sense of how this all came to be. Not only was the weather perfect, the owners of the stadium gave it to them at no cost. The whole thing was handled very mindfully and that is what I call good Karma.

His message was often light, instigating laughter from the crowd and at one point, when the sun finally broke through the clouds, he produced a genuine Patriot's ball cap and put it on his Holiness' head! The crowd clapped and roared with delight, myself included! He is indeed a human being and was sure to make that point on more than one occasion. His levity was most welcome as much as his insistence on telling us just how much we are all the same...no different. He wanted us to know that each of us is most definitely entitled to a happy and peaceful life. And...it was important to take the steps to bring ourselves to that point. I really liked one part in particular....I had heard it before...but hearing him say it was so incredible....It went something like this: If you cannot help anyone, do them no harm.....So, for me....if we can't be part of the solution, don't be the problem. That is something we could all take home. If nothing else, what if each of us adopted that little piece of wisdom? What would that look like? WOW!

In closing, I was given a poster of the event and have it lovingly placed on our little altar in our living room. Every time I walk by it, I see someone who is just a man, doing his best to spread an altruistic message to the world and it reminds me to try and do the same.

Is this the best use of our time?

Girls Like Us

Is this the best use of our time?

While we are coming and going inside our own lives, have we each taken on the simple act of mindfulness? I sure hope so, because the alternative is a grim adversary. And, for anyone out there who thinks your small works of courage and compassion don’t make a difference, I am reminded of a speech Robert Kennedy made some 43 years ago while addressing the University of Cape Town. It goes like this: “Few will have the greatness to bend history, but each of us can work to change a small portion of events, and in the total of all those acts will be written the history of this generation.” Although this very thought provoking speech was made almost two generations ago, it most definitely rings just as true and maybe even more so today. There were so many similarities going on during that time; too many echoing our current situation, in fact. But notice he still used words like bend, change and total. What would it be like for us to take on the practice of bending to create change for a total transformation to occur? Is your glass half empty or half full? Sometimes this metaphor can represent the very way in which we see the world around us as well as how we live our lives. What does your “glass” look like? Is it a soothing colour with plenty of room for good “stuff” or is it old and cracked, not quite able to contain much of anything? How do we start to see things differently?

If we did choose to bend, a possibility would be created. Change can only happen when we make a self imposed commitment. We have to feel it deep inside. It’s that spot we don’t acknowledge too often; Kind of scary, but true. Because we do know that if we did pay attention to the strong pull that is our “Wise Woman”, we would have to do something about it. It’s so much easier going day to day in a comfortable funk. Here’s the thing, though….she doesn’t quit! She may take a break here or a hiatus there, but her bright light continues to shine subtly and strongly, no worries.

Girls like us are often living a “catch 22” lifestyle. You know….when the money appears, I can figure out what I want to be when I grow up and of course, I just need to decide what path to take and then I’ll be happy in my life. The eternally internal whirling ensues and we take the “safe” way out. After all, we would have to do a whole bunch of who knows what in order to come up with a viable plan we could feel comfortable with. Who wants to do that? But here’s the deal…that grim opponent I mention is probably bigger, uglier, and scarier in our imaginations than in reality. Let’s see if we can’t reduce the fear factor a bit and create a plan for wonder…You know, wondering how things will turn out, the wonder in our hearts, wonder-“full” ideas, and the wonder of it all?!

I hope you will take time to get more intimately acquainted with your Wise Woman. She possesses a wealth of wonder just waiting to be explored!

Deborah Ricci is a freelance columnist living in Maynard with her husband, Wil. She can be found visiting with her Wise Woman in her little shop, Teresina’s in Downtown Maynard at 41 Main St. Hours: Tues.-Sat. 11-6 978-897-3914

Breakthroughs...& Breakdowns

What a day.....you too? That damned Human Condition...But here's the trick....noticing how we react to what we are handed....That, my friends is the magic formula.

Today I learned so much about myself....and after being here more than a half century, this is a good thing. Every day we each get handed a clean slate....free from any mistakes...Then...what we put on it is all up to us.

I harken back to something I was introduced to many years ago. I don't even remember the name of the class, however, this one important thing continues to stand out in my mind...relentlessly reminding me....over and over again. Are you ready? Here it is..."Is this the best use of my time, right now?" Can you imagine if we were to embrace and embody this cathartic phrase? So many things would change. We could single-handedly alter the course of our lives....softly....easily....mindfully.

I had tea with a friend this morning and after we both shared about our recent health challenges; hers, a broken right leg, and mine, torn muscles in my back, things really began to shift in our conversation. How amazing is this Universe we dwell in?! It has to drop a huge house on us to get our attention! How screwed up is that? Here's the funny part. It worked! I finally got just how hard and much I am working and got to hear another bright women's take on the same thing. Yes, we are both very bright and educated and it still took an amazing amount of Universal energy to get our attention.

So, with that said, I have made some significant changes to my schedule...you know that thing we are seriously addicted to filling up? I have given myself permission to heal myself purposefully, and lovingly. The shift has occurred because I created a clearing for it to enter into my life. Only we possess the power to create change. What will you do to manifest this mind-boggling transformation? I invite you to entertain this amazing possibility.

It's all good!

What "jazzes" us?

What jazzes you? Do you live in the moment? Time is the elusive thief, coming and going, most certainly with a multitude of everything and anything you can think of. Of course...all of the obvious "stuff" that we each have going on, whether we like it or not, along with anything else that just seems to come along for the ride...and it has been a ride; a roller coaster of emotions, some good...for many of us. And...with a feeling of inner strength rising to the surface making itself known in a very surprising way. I believe we are indeed a country on the mend. The journey has only just begun and while we roll up our sleeves and take the first steps, let's not loose sight of our OWN personal quest. Albeit as intertwined as it may be, let's remember to take some time to peruse our map on a regular basis so as not to loose track of the routes we were in the midst of travelling.

Do you have a muse? Of course you don't...only artists have muses, right? I'm here to dispel the rumor that artists and musicians are the only folk who are allowed to have muses. The art of choosing a muse doesn't have to be complicated. It can be the simplest of tasks; just the right thing at just the right moment. (There's that moment thing again.) Let's jump on the possibility that we too, can have our very own muses! What brings us aesthetic pleasure? Do not dismay, my friend! These things take time and must be handled delicately. After all, we just found out we are entitled to have our muse! How great is that?

Make a list of all the things you love and are grateful for in your life...Watch what happens! You might notice some overlap. Pay attention to that part of your list. Fine tune it and after some purposeful pondering, you muse will show up, I promise! Now all we have to do is SHOW UP in our life....every day! Find something to be jazzed about and make an attempt to honour your muse. I dare say that at first, it may feel awkward and downright weird, but push through....March on! Your destiny awaits your new found talents. They were there all along and just didn't realize it was OK to show up quite yet. Oh...and yes, when confronted by the naysayers, and there will be naysayers, thank them for sharing and get right back to what your were doing. They'll get the message sooner or later and won't they be happily surprised when your book becomes a best seller and the accolades are coming from those previously know as the band of naysayers and "no-wayers" who all of a sudden want to extol your virtues?!

Anyway...writing this Blog has been a dream of mine and one day, just about a week ago, I knew it was time to Blog On! I feel blessed to have this opportunity to share my life with you on a regular basis and hope you can find a spark of inspiration to follow your hearts and find your muse. Girls like us need to give ourselves permission to create. After all, we possess great power. The secret is to access it and dwell in it. Your treasure awaits you...Get our your maps and plot your course. X marks the spot!